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Is Resurrection only for the innocent?
for Lazarus, little girls, and Christ?
No, we are promised ourselves Resurrection
of the body, our bodies, however imperfect
and our own souls, however imperfect
transformed by faith into Love
this is the greatest forgiveness.
Might we all be
no longer desiring or capable of harming others?
Might we all be
no longer afraid?
if all creation is redeemed,
then all lives can be,
have been,
will be redeemed?
Forgiveness does not obliterate justice but revenge.
(originally written April 18, 2008)
Showing posts with label atonement. Show all posts
Showing posts with label atonement. Show all posts
Monday, May 05, 2008
Atonement as Seen from My Cell
(originally written April 18, 2008)
Atonement, as seen from a prison cell at 5am.
If Jesus "had to die", then we just had to kill him.
Yet if we had to kill him, we credit ourselves for having saved ourselves from sin.
If we saved ourselves, we have no use for God.
No. It is not like this.
Crucifixion is not atonement; it is murder. Let it not be otherwise.
The great fault in our use of the Gospels is that we have been deluded into believing that an innocent must die so that we might be saved.
And we have continued in that delusion 2,000 years.
And in every war in our world we play out that delusion over and over:
That the innocent must die so we are "saved."
So we should not rejoice that Jesus "died for us."
No, let us admit: Jesus died because of us.
Let us not pat ourselves on the back.
The sin of the world was not so great that we had no option but to kill him, that Jesus had to be sent to die.
No. Innocent blood serves nothing. It is only loss.
Rather, the sin of the world was so great that Jesus had to be sent--to live among us, and teach us again how to love; our ideas of love, God, and reconciliation had become so tortured and wrong.
And our sin was so great that we killed love's teacher, we killed Love.
No. Crucifixion is only an affront to God. Not a peace offering.
We must never forget this.
Resurrection on the other hand, now, that's Atonement.
That is picking up the pieces of the broken Christ, healing in order to heal the world and not destroy it, to forgive;
Only God could choose this.
We did not force God's hand in this;
We did not help God save us.
We were not secretly counting on resurrection,
Only execution.
Resurrection and its healing is not what we deserved for our deed, but what God chose to do, for us.
Crucifixion is what Jesus did not deserve.
Resurrection welcomes us back as forgiven children, though we were once convicted murderers. It is not Death Row, but New Life. Our past is not to be forgotten but we still must take joy in the Great Forgiveness.
No, we must never forget the Crucifixion.
We must never pat ourselves on the back for it.
Must never declare it necessary
or any other rationalization of our deed.
We must not blame God for our fault.
We must instead recognize that God chose to love us, Despite.
Resurrection is the great surprise and cause for celebration.
And we must never forget, there are plenty of people in the world today
who do not deserve to die
but we believe we have to kill them
for some greater glory, for collateral damage.
They are right to see themselves in the
crucified Christ and to see Christ in themselves.
They are witness to the whole human depravity.
God speaks to them hope of Resurrection
But we should not find ourselves comforted.
But we go on destroying the innocent
Crediting ourselves for saving ourselves
Blaming God and the victims for their deaths
Why is love so hard to learn?
Atonement, as seen from a prison cell at 5am.
If Jesus "had to die", then we just had to kill him.
Yet if we had to kill him, we credit ourselves for having saved ourselves from sin.
If we saved ourselves, we have no use for God.
No. It is not like this.
Crucifixion is not atonement; it is murder. Let it not be otherwise.
The great fault in our use of the Gospels is that we have been deluded into believing that an innocent must die so that we might be saved.
And we have continued in that delusion 2,000 years.
And in every war in our world we play out that delusion over and over:
That the innocent must die so we are "saved."
So we should not rejoice that Jesus "died for us."
No, let us admit: Jesus died because of us.
Let us not pat ourselves on the back.
The sin of the world was not so great that we had no option but to kill him, that Jesus had to be sent to die.
No. Innocent blood serves nothing. It is only loss.
Rather, the sin of the world was so great that Jesus had to be sent--to live among us, and teach us again how to love; our ideas of love, God, and reconciliation had become so tortured and wrong.
And our sin was so great that we killed love's teacher, we killed Love.
No. Crucifixion is only an affront to God. Not a peace offering.
We must never forget this.
Resurrection on the other hand, now, that's Atonement.
That is picking up the pieces of the broken Christ, healing in order to heal the world and not destroy it, to forgive;
Only God could choose this.
We did not force God's hand in this;
We did not help God save us.
We were not secretly counting on resurrection,
Only execution.
Resurrection and its healing is not what we deserved for our deed, but what God chose to do, for us.
Crucifixion is what Jesus did not deserve.
Resurrection welcomes us back as forgiven children, though we were once convicted murderers. It is not Death Row, but New Life. Our past is not to be forgotten but we still must take joy in the Great Forgiveness.
No, we must never forget the Crucifixion.
We must never pat ourselves on the back for it.
Must never declare it necessary
or any other rationalization of our deed.
We must not blame God for our fault.
We must instead recognize that God chose to love us, Despite.
Resurrection is the great surprise and cause for celebration.
And we must never forget, there are plenty of people in the world today
who do not deserve to die
but we believe we have to kill them
for some greater glory, for collateral damage.
They are right to see themselves in the
crucified Christ and to see Christ in themselves.
They are witness to the whole human depravity.
God speaks to them hope of Resurrection
But we should not find ourselves comforted.
But we go on destroying the innocent
Crediting ourselves for saving ourselves
Blaming God and the victims for their deaths
Why is love so hard to learn?
Thursday, April 17, 2008
April 17, Part 2
I got a brief visit to a friend’s cell today; she has the benefit of being in the corner as the longest inmate here. It was amazing to see such an immaculate cell – she washes her floor every day. (To be honest, mine has dust bunnies). I also learned a lot of neat tricks (like where else can become a handy storage shelf.) She also showed me pictures of her adorable daughter, about two years old. Also her parents and her dog. She holds back the tears better than most. Today she also shared with us a beautiful Orthodox Easter card with a mosaic pattern of “Pantokrator” (a famous icon of Jesus which looks half-stern) and the decorated, intricate eggs.
There was a harsh exchange of words today at breakfast – a letter arrived from a woman who has now moved on to rehab. Another woman, with many drug problems herself, denigrated the woman who wrote the letter, saying that she would never get ‘clean.’ So the woman receiving the letter told the critic that it was she who would never really get ‘clean,’ and that she was a hypocrite for saying in the pod she fully intended to go use again, while saying she was clean and planned to stay that way in the A.A. meetings, etc. All in far less pleasant words. The exchange really got me thinking, about a lot of things: about lying, about planning to go back to an addiction, about who is redeemable – in the letter-writer’s defense, the third woman said, “I believe everyone deserves a second chance! And a third, fourth and fifth chance! At least she’s trying!” What book did I just finish reading? It said that if creation has been redeemed then all lives, no matter how destroyed, are capable of redemption. I was also thinking back to Levitical codes of ‘clean,’ as well as Jesus’ words about clean and unclean – and think of what it has and does mean/take to become ‘clean.’ Finally, I was thinking, it is hard for me to love this ‘hypocrite,’ though I am trying. She’s not a very pleasant person and likes to throw her weight around. She’s not very loving to the more vulnerable women. She’s been here nearly as long as my Rumanian friend, well over a year. Her parents are practicing ‘tough love’ by keeping her here and not bonding her out, which probably is the only way to keep her off the drugs, let alone the stealing to get the drugs. Will I, though, believe that every life can be redeemed? If I say I do, I must work harder to love this person.
And while I am on the topic of redeeming and loving the people near or at rock-bottom, I am led to think about others who persistently frustrate me. My ire is frequently raised by wealthy so-called liberals or progressives, especially ones who call themselves “progressive Christians,” who seem to be only after fame and fortune, treating anyone who doesn’t help them attain either like dirt.
---
Women here do not work. I have heard there was a small sex scandal earlier that ended women inmates’ working, but I don’t know that for a fact. Anyway, there are about a half-dozen men who do work in the jail on a daily basis – in the kitchen in the laundry, on the custodial rounds. They wear tan scrubs instead of orange. They’re always watched by a guard, but they have some additional freedom, too. I was pondering all this during laundry rounds today – especially how remarkably natural they are about distributing women’s underwear. I would probably even be embarrassed in such a situation.
Anyway, the lack of ‘work’ doesn’t bother me. I get all the social interaction I could want and then some in our dayroom. And I am often at ‘work’ translating, transcribing, and counseling, and writing letters. Still it is a good balance of work, play, and rest – it brings additional meaning to this month rather than frustration. (Now, spending a month only playing spades and eating junk food – I might get impatient with that. But it suits others just fine, and I understand it, too. I think.)
There was a harsh exchange of words today at breakfast – a letter arrived from a woman who has now moved on to rehab. Another woman, with many drug problems herself, denigrated the woman who wrote the letter, saying that she would never get ‘clean.’ So the woman receiving the letter told the critic that it was she who would never really get ‘clean,’ and that she was a hypocrite for saying in the pod she fully intended to go use again, while saying she was clean and planned to stay that way in the A.A. meetings, etc. All in far less pleasant words. The exchange really got me thinking, about a lot of things: about lying, about planning to go back to an addiction, about who is redeemable – in the letter-writer’s defense, the third woman said, “I believe everyone deserves a second chance! And a third, fourth and fifth chance! At least she’s trying!” What book did I just finish reading? It said that if creation has been redeemed then all lives, no matter how destroyed, are capable of redemption. I was also thinking back to Levitical codes of ‘clean,’ as well as Jesus’ words about clean and unclean – and think of what it has and does mean/take to become ‘clean.’ Finally, I was thinking, it is hard for me to love this ‘hypocrite,’ though I am trying. She’s not a very pleasant person and likes to throw her weight around. She’s not very loving to the more vulnerable women. She’s been here nearly as long as my Rumanian friend, well over a year. Her parents are practicing ‘tough love’ by keeping her here and not bonding her out, which probably is the only way to keep her off the drugs, let alone the stealing to get the drugs. Will I, though, believe that every life can be redeemed? If I say I do, I must work harder to love this person.
And while I am on the topic of redeeming and loving the people near or at rock-bottom, I am led to think about others who persistently frustrate me. My ire is frequently raised by wealthy so-called liberals or progressives, especially ones who call themselves “progressive Christians,” who seem to be only after fame and fortune, treating anyone who doesn’t help them attain either like dirt.
---
Women here do not work. I have heard there was a small sex scandal earlier that ended women inmates’ working, but I don’t know that for a fact. Anyway, there are about a half-dozen men who do work in the jail on a daily basis – in the kitchen in the laundry, on the custodial rounds. They wear tan scrubs instead of orange. They’re always watched by a guard, but they have some additional freedom, too. I was pondering all this during laundry rounds today – especially how remarkably natural they are about distributing women’s underwear. I would probably even be embarrassed in such a situation.
Anyway, the lack of ‘work’ doesn’t bother me. I get all the social interaction I could want and then some in our dayroom. And I am often at ‘work’ translating, transcribing, and counseling, and writing letters. Still it is a good balance of work, play, and rest – it brings additional meaning to this month rather than frustration. (Now, spending a month only playing spades and eating junk food – I might get impatient with that. But it suits others just fine, and I understand it, too. I think.)
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