Booksaustion!

It is done. My Iraq book, that is. I am printing it off and sending it back to the editor tomorrow morning. 80,000 words; 200 pages; lots and lots of late nights. I've been averaging a 3am bedtime this past week. But hey--I wrote a book!

I don't quite know how it'll all work out from here--I hope that I have a better sense of things by the time I get my second, third, fourth, etc. books finished. I have that many at least in various stages of completion--it's just that I didn't know before how to actually get published. And I was doing it primarily for family before, or therapy, or...whatever.

I have to talk a little about completing the Iraq book in particular. As of this Memorial Day weekend, I am now four years out of Iraq. It is hard to read how at the very end of my time there, just after the Abu Ghraib scandal broke, that Iraqis--and we--believed that healing might come, that perhaps the worst was over. No, it was not to be. Rather, Abu Ghraib and all that went into it launched us over into the abyss and we have yet to recover.

Still, here is one testimony, and many testimonies within it, for peace. Words that will now no longer be forgotten or silenced. Some words have never been public before. I was thinking of that, and what it may mean, as I went back through and filled in the spaces between the letters and human rights reports I'd written publicly earlier.

In the meantime, it's a funny feeling, having immersed myself entirely in that book for the past few days--immediately preceded by the jail article; immediately followed by the Iran article and two final papers for school. Anyway, in the midst of this, I realized how quickly I got pulled back into the feeling of being there--particularly as everything went to hell in spring of '04 (Abu Ghraib/Blackwater/Fallujah). The past little while, I've been sitting in my chair by the window, in mild Hyde Park, Chicago, and yet the hair-trigger anticipation that a bomb might blow up the car in the street, or the building nearby could go boom, or the person on the sidewalk will raise a gun towards the apartment--I'm a little on edge, I guess.

So, perhaps I will not feel so guilty for having sloughed off my writing for today. Perhaps a little TLC was needed instead. I walked around the neighborhood and documented the murals that are about to disappear; I enjoyed the weather; I ate Middle Eastern food (a kefta sandwich and shourb adas, lentil soup); I made sure to reply to all the lovely people who've invited me for coffee. And I needed to rest my neck, eyes, and wrists--all of which have been killing me this week. They are recuperating nicely as of this evening.

Tomorrow, then, back to work. There's more to get done.

peace,
Le Anne

Yay! I'm published online at the Christian Century!

Greetings friends, I just wanted to let you know that my article, 'Faith in Jail,' has been published on the Christian Century's website and blog (called theolog.org).  This is my first of hopefully at least two.

 

You can see it, and all the comments folks have written, here:  http://www.theolog.org/blog/2008/05/seminary-behind.html#more

 

You can also read just my article below.  Enjoy!

peace,

Le Anne

(madly working on that second article, book edits, oh, and final papers... :)

 

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Seminary behind bars

By Le Anne Clausen

I spent spring term of seminary in prison serving a 30-day sentence for civil disobedience at the School of the Americas.

Being a good seminarian as well as an activist, I'd hoped to take along Bonhoeffer's Letters and Papers, King's Letter from a Birmingham Jail, Thoreau's treatise on Civil Disobedience.

But books, magazines and newspapers weren't allowed—only a prison-issued Bible produced by Prison Fellowship. There was a library, but we couldn't use it unless a guard could escort us personally, and most of the time they didn't want to. I realized I was in a theological desert, and begin to read and love crime novels again. They were slightly less disturbing than the endless hours of "true crime" television shows chosen for the prisoners by the guards.

The jail was in suburban Illinois, and nearly all the female inmates were white. We had an overflow population from the immigration detention center in the next cell block. Most people were there because they couldn't afford to bail out. Younger women were usually there for drug-related reasons; older women, alcohol-related.

I was surprised that the younger women saw me as old (I'm 30), and even more surprised that they sought me out for pastoral care. I established office hours from my cell. I worked with immigrants who had no access to translators for legal aid requests. I took dictation for women who wanted to write their families but couldn't do so on their own. It was as busy a pastorate as any I've known. The most common concern of the women was separation from their children—I'd hear loud wails from the phone area night after night.

I found myself filled with anger every time we had "church." A local fundamentalist group would show up. There were no hymns and the prisoners weren't allowed to speak. Instead we got a full dose of preaching about how awful we were and how we needed Jesus; and the dangers of non-Christian faiths and homosexuality. The prison-issued Bible and other "approved" religious books (http://www.celebraterecovery.com.au/) also came with similar agendas inserted in them. One leader made us read the Day of Atonement text (Leviticus 16) and commented, "This is what Jews have to do to get their forgiveness. Aren't you glad all you need is Jesus?" When I calmly suggested she consider some seminary courses, she took my remark as a compliment.

Frustrated, I talked with a friend who was Eastern Orthodox. She put it in perspective: "We may not agree with what they say, but at least they come. And it's our only chance to get out of this box for an hour or so, to sit in a real chair instead of a cold steel bench, and they care, or they wouldn't keep coming back. They write me cards. They take this seriously."

The new chaplain, however, gave me hope. She advised me to focus my Bible study on Paul's letters from prison, and reflect on how he ministered to others while himself a prisoner. She said she wished she could offer more ministry programs for inmates, but said possibilities were limited because McHenry County is a maximum security facility. She thought the next best approach was to work with the women after they were released, to offer a support circle similar to those the women formed inside—something many of them had never experienced elsewhere.

On the day of my release I met a group of local pastors outside the jail. By coincidence, they'd just visited with the sergeant to ensure access to their parishioners as well as immigration detainees. But although they'd been assured they could visit without restrictions, my fellow inmates and I had been told that if our pastor came to visit, we would forfeit a family visit for the week.

We agreed to work on this and other problems together. There is a lot of work to be done.

Le Anne Clausen is a senior M.Div. student at Chicago Theological Seminary. She blogs at Journal of a Young Activist (www.young-activist.blogspot.com).

We Won! People Power Victory over the SOA/WHINSEC!

Victory in Congress! Pentagon Forced to Release Information to the Public - On to the Senate! Many thanks to all of you who acted quickly to this week's alert! We won! See below the update from our friends at SOA Watch. Thanks to your efforts and hard work in defense of human rights, the culture of secrecy and lack of accountability surrounding Defense Department policies suffered a severe blow today when the U.S. House of Representatives approved the McGovern-Sestak-Bishop (GA) amendment to the National Defense Authorization Act for FY 2009. The amendment forces the public release of names, rank, country of origin, courses and dates of attendance of WHINSEC's graduates and instructors to the public. The amendment was approved with a 220 to 189 vote! This is a major victory for the international human rights community!You spoke up and now we are one step closer to transparency and closing the SOA/WHINSEC! In recent years, WHINSEC has denied information that in the past has been vital in identifying the perpetrators of massacres, targeted assassinations, and human rights abuses committed in Latin America. In response to WHINSEC's lack of transparency and its willingness to undermine public attempts of exercising oversight of the institution, human rights advocates and constituents have taken a stand for justice and demanded Congress to hold WHINSEC accountable. The access to information regarding students and instructors attending WHINSEC will allow human rights organizations to continue to monitor the school and identify those graduates and instructors who have violated human rights or taken part in criminal activities in their home countries. Information is power, and the more information we have, the closer we are to closing the SOA/WHINSEC once and for all! We Won the House, Now Comes the Senate! The approval of this amendment will now lead us to face a new challenge to insure that WHINSEC also be held accountable by the U.S. Senate, in the coming weeks we will continue to keep you updated so we can work together towards another victory. Thanks again for all your efforts! Have a terrific holiday weekend!

Please call-- Important Surprise Vote on the SOA/WHINSEC! Call Congress Today!

Greetings friends,

I want to thank all of you who have supported me throughout my civil disobedience this past year at SOA, as well as my time in jail and the larger work of human rights in Central and South America. I don't wish to clog your inbox, but I have a favor to ask of you, that if you are able to please call your Representatives today (202-224-3121 for the switchboard, and give them your Rep's name, or even your city/town, and they will connect you, it's very easy), and ask that they vote to support the McGovern-Sestak-Bishop (GA) amendment to the National Defense Authorization Bill of 2009. This demands that the SOA/WHINSEC comply with Freedom of Information Acts on their faculty and students, so that those who have been implicated in human rights abuses can be held accountable. Full details are below. You can also go to http://www.soaw.org/ and http://www.witnessforpeace.org/ websites to get more info if things below don't come through on your e-mail. Many thanks again for your help and support!

peace,

Le Anne

Call Congress Today! Important Vote on the SOA/WHINSEC The following alert is from our friends at SOAW. Also scroll down for an important update and action on Plan Mexico. Our friends at SOA Watch have received confirmation that Congress will vote on an amendment to the National Defense Authorization Act for FY 2009 that would require that the School of the Americas/WHINSEC release the names, ranks, country of origin, courses and dates attended of students and instructors at the institute. The amendment will be offered by Representative Jim McGovern (D-MA), Representative Joe Sestak (D-PA) and Representative Sanford Bishop (D-GA) and we expect the vote to happen on Thursday, May 22. For the past few years, despite the WHINSEC PR machine proclaiming an open and transparent school, the WHINSEC has been unwilling to provide information about the students and instructors. Freedom of Information Act requests for FY 2005, 2006 and 2007 have all been denied, proof of WHINSEC's unwillingness to submit to oversight from the public whose tax-payer dollars help fund the school. Access to information regarding SOA/WHINSEC graduates of previous years has been a valuable asset to human rights organizations who have been able to identify Latin American military officers and police that have committed human rights abuses or engaged in criminal activity in their home countries after attending the school as instructors or students. SOA Watch supports the release of this important information at all U.S. military training facilities in the spirit of openness, transparency, and the public's "right to know". It is crucial for the success of this amendment that you contact your Representative TODAY and TOMORROW! SEND AN EMAIL AND FAX TO YOUR REPRESENTATIVE NOW!(Be sure to click the "Send a Fax" box to have the fax sent) CALL YOUR REPRESENTATIVE! WEDNESDAY, May 21 - THURSDAY, May 22: 202-224-3121 (Congressional Switchboard Number) Once your call is forwarded to the office of your Representative, ask to speak with the foreign affairs legislative assistant. Here is a suggested message for you to convey: "Hello, My name is __________, and as your constituent, I urge you to vote YES on the McGovern-Sestak-Bishop (GA) amendment to the National Defense Authorization Bill for Fiscal Year 2009. The amendment would release the names, country of origin, rank and dates of attendance at WHINSEC for graduates and instructors. This amendment is supported by Chairman of the Armed Services Committee, Congressman Ike Skelton. As you may know the School of the Americas, renamed WHINSEC, has a notorious history linked to serious crimes and human rights abuses throughout Latin America. In the past few years under WHINSEC, known human rights abusers have attended the school and WHINSEC instructors have been arrested in Colombia for returning home and aiding the drug cartels. None of this information would be known if the basic information about enrollment at WHINSEC were not disclosed. This information is vital to the work of Congress and human rights organizations who seek protection of human rights and promoting transparency, however all FOIA requests for this information are now being denied. What is WHINSEC hiding?! Voting YES on the McGovern-Sestak-Bishop (GA) amendment is a vote FOR human rights and FOR transparency. I urge your boss to vote YES!!!" SEND AN EMAIL AND FAX TO YOUR REPRESENTATIVE NOW! For more information, visit the SOA Watch website Plan Mexico Moves to the Senate! Call Your Senators Today! As we take another step towards closing the institution notorious for training Latin American militaries, a spending bill that would arm the Mexican military is moving forward in Congress! Last week a version of Plan Mexico, officially called the Merida Initiative, passed in the House by 256 to 166 (click here to see how your reps voted). The bill that passed included less military hardware than the Bush administration's original proposal, but still promoted a failed "war on drugs" model that threatens Mexicans' human rights. (Click here for more background info.) Now a similar version is under debate in the Senate, with a vote likely to happen this week! Act Now: Call your Senators and ask that they speak against and vote against the Merida Initiative funding in the supplemental appropriations bill. Use the talking points here. To reach your Senators' offices, call the US Capitol Switchboard at 202-224-3121 and ask to be connected to your Senators (give your state if you do not know who they are).

Resurrection for All?

Is Resurrection only for the innocent?
for Lazarus, little girls, and Christ?

No, we are promised ourselves Resurrection
of the body, our bodies, however imperfect
and our own souls, however imperfect
transformed by faith into Love
this is the greatest forgiveness.

Might we all be
no longer desiring or capable of harming others?
Might we all be
no longer afraid?

if all creation is redeemed,
then all lives can be,
have been,
will be redeemed?

Forgiveness does not obliterate justice but revenge.

(originally written April 18, 2008)

Atonement as Seen from My Cell

(originally written April 18, 2008)

Atonement, as seen from a prison cell at 5am.

If Jesus "had to die", then we just had to kill him.
Yet if we had to kill him, we credit ourselves for having saved ourselves from sin.
If we saved ourselves, we have no use for God.
No. It is not like this.
Crucifixion is not atonement; it is murder. Let it not be otherwise.

The great fault in our use of the Gospels is that we have been deluded into believing that an innocent must die so that we might be saved.

And we have continued in that delusion 2,000 years.

And in every war in our world we play out that delusion over and over:
That the innocent must die so we are "saved."

So we should not rejoice that Jesus "died for us."
No, let us admit: Jesus died because of us.

Let us not pat ourselves on the back.

The sin of the world was not so great that we had no option but to kill him, that Jesus had to be sent to die.

No. Innocent blood serves nothing. It is only loss.

Rather, the sin of the world was so great that Jesus had to be sent--to live among us, and teach us again how to love; our ideas of love, God, and reconciliation had become so tortured and wrong.

And our sin was so great that we killed love's teacher, we killed Love.

No. Crucifixion is only an affront to God. Not a peace offering.
We must never forget this.

Resurrection on the other hand, now, that's Atonement.
That is picking up the pieces of the broken Christ, healing in order to heal the world and not destroy it, to forgive;

Only God could choose this.
We did not force God's hand in this;
We did not help God save us.
We were not secretly counting on resurrection,
Only execution.

Resurrection and its healing is not what we deserved for our deed, but what God chose to do, for us.

Crucifixion is what Jesus did not deserve.

Resurrection welcomes us back as forgiven children, though we were once convicted murderers. It is not Death Row, but New Life. Our past is not to be forgotten but we still must take joy in the Great Forgiveness.

No, we must never forget the Crucifixion.
We must never pat ourselves on the back for it.
Must never declare it necessary
or any other rationalization of our deed.
We must not blame God for our fault.
We must instead recognize that God chose to love us, Despite.

Resurrection is the great surprise and cause for celebration.

And we must never forget, there are plenty of people in the world today
who do not deserve to die
but we believe we have to kill them
for some greater glory, for collateral damage.
They are right to see themselves in the
crucified Christ and to see Christ in themselves.
They are witness to the whole human depravity.
God speaks to them hope of Resurrection
But we should not find ourselves comforted.

But we go on destroying the innocent
Crediting ourselves for saving ourselves
Blaming God and the victims for their deaths
Why is love so hard to learn?